I know who will answer this question 
How do you add non-friends to your mafia? (need to grow my mafia)
you made a second Facebook profile with mafia wars app. How would you get --err, myself #2--to be in my mafia without adding as a friend? Hmmm
not sure, but just go ahead and add yourself as your friend, what's the harm?

Use Jane Doe and make it less obvious 
Facebook does not allow that name surprisingly! (*edit, but yes i will make it less obvious
)

Single & Not Looking
I can't answer it right now, but I will later this evening. I know there are groups that you can join that can help you out. I also noticed though that I get random friend requests from people to join their family. I believe if you go to the hitlist you'll will see a list of people on there and their profiles are clickable, so if you do that, it will pull up their MW profile and theres a link to add to family I believe, try that and let me know. I don't add random people so I've never done that but I do think that works